Chapter 1 - Origin

 

I'm convinced that when we help our children find healthy ways of dealing with their feelings, ways that don’t hurt them or anyone else. We’re making our world a safer, better place - Mr. Rogers

Childhood is supposed to be a happy time. It is when we are vulnerable to anything that happens, whether good or bad. That is why every child should receive care and love from their family, friends, and teachers.

It helps develop qualities like curiosity and self-confidence. Curiosity is important for the initiation of learning something. Curious child wants to learn about their surroundings. Self-confidence is necessary to keep doing the thing that child starts to learn.

Unfortunately, some children or I would rather be bold to say most of them, do not get the conducive environment, love, and care to develop these qualities in their childhood. Some receive cold treatment from their parents; some even face a trauma from physical assault and sexual abuse.

It is painful to talk about these things, but we must address them despite being difficult here.

Almost all problems start in childhood and haunt us for the rest of our lives. We keep wondering what is wrong with us. It makes us feel that we are not good enough. We keep wondering why we react in such ways, why some situations haunt us but seem normal to others.

What causes these things to happen?

And if they are the result of traumatic childhood experiences.

Why our elders did this to us?

There is a famous dialogue explaining the cause “ We are victims of victims.” the parents or people who do such things with children are themselves facing mental difficulties. Some are unhappy with their jobs, spouse, or their parents. People who do child abuse in the form of physical assault and sexual abuse are found to be dealing with these problems themselves. Some might have desires that are not being addressed and not allowed by society. Children seem to fall prey to these things as they cannot voice out and rebel like adults.

Does all this justify these deep wounds we give to our children? Of course not.

What can we do to prevent and control these things? Once happen, they have long-lasting impacts.

It isn’t my past; it is my present - Helena Wilson

Any unpleasant situation where you lose control leaves a traumatic experience. We are still determining the difficulty of the situation. The experience itself is a horror but also leaves an impact on some of us.

Whenever we experience any sound, image, or similar situation, we start re-experiencing the incident that occurred in the past, known as a stressful post-traumatic experience. This becomes a problem in daily life because the person suffering from it starts avoiding certain areas, sounds, images, etc., limiting activity.

Life cannot be lived fully like this, and all these problems are managed when the right kind of help is taken. The help of a psychologist by taking therapy and talking with friends makes things easier to cope with.

All these things will make you slowly realize that the incidents will not happen again because you are not the same person you were in that situation. We become stronger with time but do not realize it in such situations. Learning that the problems that happened in the past will not happen again and can be left in the past will decrease the bitterness and lead you toward a happier life.

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