Look for the
magic in daily routines - Lou Barlow
I was brought up
by my sisters. They always took care of me, which made me an asshole. I had no
habit of taking my glass of water to drink myself and will ask one of them to
hand it over to me whenever I felt thirsty. They fed me while I was reading.
They sacrificed their precious time. When I left home a few years back to live
alone. I started doing the daily work independently. Cleaning the floor,
washing dishes, buying groceries, and cooking myself. It was the most
challenging time of my life. I was only programmed to do things that gave me a
high about myself. These things were part of the so-called mundane life. I
started getting stomach aches while doing the dishes and backache when I
cleaned the floor. It was not due to any physical cause in my body but anxiety.
I felt so uncomfortable doing all these things. I never did these things on my
own, and due to this, I realized a fear that I was dealing with.
When you don’t
know the skills to survive by yourself and become dependent on others, it will
create fear. There is a feeling of not having control over your life. I felt I
would not be able to live alone. This further creates a hidden fear of
separation from those caring for you.
If they care for
you, this person is usually your mother, father, and sometimes siblings. If one
is lucky to have parents and siblings who care, this problem is benign. But
most of us don’t know what people want from us.
This dependence
on people makes us weak while making decisions when these people want us to do
something wrong. It might not be excellent for you to hear. Most of you would
not have faced a situation till now, but it will be easier for those who have
gone through this. The rest of us will probably face this in the future.
So, by
understanding the grave nature of this problem. We should start inculcating the
habit of becoming independent in these survival routines. We all should live
away from home to create an environment of loneliness.
Inner strength
comes by itself when you are not dependent on anybody, especially for the basic
necessities of life. Inner strength comes from practicing these things on a
regular basis so that they become your integral part. Like a martial artist
practices his kicks, you should practice your chores daily. It all starts with
waking up early and making your bed. Learning to become independent with your
food. Learning to reach your workplace on time etc. It’s all the mundane and
boring part of your day which makes you reach a step towards your goals.
Doing these
chores will be painful at first. Once you develop the habits, it will remove
the fear of loneliness if you stand up for your thoughts. Otherwise, your
thoughts will succumb to your fears. Hence, you must become independent in
self-care and chores to develop a strong character.
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